Juggling is the reality

My indie life has always been about juggling. There’s no escaping it.

I posted this the other day on X.

I try my best to put out a true picture. The juggling never seems to stop. The only that seems to change is the intensity of it all. I’m always juggling, but sometimes I feel like I’m juggling too many balls. Or perhaps sometimes I feel like I’m juggling fire. ☄️

Right now the intensity is high. Sometimes I’m totally chill, other days have been exhausting. Overall it balances itself out.

I do make life choices to reduce the juggling.

I don’t really travel, it gets way too complicated to accommodate the kids.

I don’t get out to socialise that much, though I’m trying to address that professionally with local meetups.

It’s been way too long since we’ve had a proper holiday.

I opt for the simple life where possible.

On the flip side, there are so many positives about my life. It’s easy to get stuck in the exhaustion of ‘but I’m always juggling’, but I recognise that I do make progress. I’m also aware that living another life full of different demands would be even more exhausting. The progress that I do make is so slow that it is hard to see. I pinch myself how lucky I am. 20 years ago I would not have dreamed this was possible.

I’m with my kids every day and I love it. I’m happy to be there for them. To be that taxi mother. To be by their side at so many (not all) sessions they go to. To be there at bed time. To swap duties with my husband as and when needed.

The norm is for us to be around for the kids. And for my youngest girls it’s obvious how embedded this is for them. It gives them a sense of shock when I’m out for the day and am not there in the evening for bedtime. They can’t comprehend it. 😆

We love each other’s company. As I believe it should be. And as I get older, I believe I’ll have fewer regrets. I still pushed for my career and work that matters to me, but I’ve managed to find a way to carefully balance everyone’s needs.

Life with a family is always going to be busy. I’m always going to be somewhat jealous of the people who can digital nomad without responsibility, but as a parent, I’m going to be on the go for 18 hours a day, I may as well do it on my terms.